There is something that needs to be said out loud, and I’ve been holding back, thinking that sooner or later I’d get over it. That hasn’t worked, so here goes.
A few years ago, I did a crazy thing. I turned on my television.
Now I say it was crazy because I’m not big on television AND because I heard some bizarre things that night on Larry King Live.
It was the night he had several prominent self-help experts talking about positive thinking. Larry asked his panel if they ever had a bad day at the very end of the segment. In their own fashion, each person said, “No,” they don’t have bad days. That’s when crazy happened.
Now the way I figure it, these folks are either delusional or in denial. Either way, it’s not a good thing.
Never have a bad day?
In a word: Impossible!
In two words: Crazy Making!
Okay, so technically, in the land of the ‘very aware’ and the ‘super conscious,’ there are no ‘bad’ days as long as we grow and evolve from every experience we have. But that’s growing and evolving from — that’s not what actually happens in the lives of actual humans, self-help experts or not.
In real life, we humans seek contrast for the richness and depth it brings to our lives. After all, without up, there would be no down; without scarcity, there would be no abundance; without indifference, there would be no passion. Without bad days there would be no good days included. Contrast is excellent for the human spirit: It gets us closer to our goals, helps us clarify our desires, and gives us something to bounce back to.
Those in the human potential field are not exempt from hard times, challenges, temper tantrums, frustrations, or bad days.
We’re likely quite experienced in some of these areas or would not be inclined to help others with them. What do they say about “teaching the things we most need to learn?”
Pretending that we don’t have bad days, regardless of how emotionally and spiritually intelligent we are, is just plain irresponsible bunk. These kinds of claims set the teachers of the self-help movement on a pedestal which causes our ‘students’ to feel twice as bad because they think to themselves, “I can never be like them, so why even try.”
We are sought out to normalize behavior: To educate and inform people that, yes, it is normal to feel sad when someone dies and yes, it is customary to get depressed when a lover leaves, and yes, it is normal for everyone to have a bad day.
There, I said it.
What was the worst (most bad) day you ever bounced back from How did you do it?
Please share in the comment section below — we’d love to learn from you.
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Nancy D. Solomon, MA Psych is the CEO and Founder of The Leadership Incubator where she helps leaders identify, address, and resolve people's problems before they become profit problems so everyone can focus on what they were hired to do-- INNOVATE AND DRIVE GROWTH.
Known as The Impact Expert, she is a main stage speaker, expert trainer, and veteran coach who helps leaders solve key issues related to leadership development, employee engagement, and advancing women.
Nancy has made a difference for such companies as Microsoft, Target, Acura, Westin, Nordstrom & ADP as well as with many passionate individuals.