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FEAR: THE NUMBER ONE REASON YOU DON'T HAVE WHAT YOU WANT




There are a multitude of reasons we fail to turn our brilliant ideas, our intellectual capital, our genius into actionable items and bottom-line results.


The two biggies are, predictably, fear (90%) and timing (10%). Everyone experiences fear. “Getting It Done” people have similar fears as the “Talking it to Death” folks. And the quantity of fear doesn’t vary much between the groups either.


We are born with only two fears: the fear of loud noises and the fear of falling. Thus, the rest we acquired on our life journey.


I know, I know, all of us have met people who claim to be fearless. My industry is saturated with them. There are dozens of books on the shelves declaring ‘live a fearless life’,have fear no more’, ‘banish fear from your life once and for all’.” Yadda, yadda, yadda & blah, blah, blah!


If someone tells you they don’t have any fear, they lie to both of you.


These books were written by people who drank the ‘If I say it positively enough, any fool will believe me’ Kool-Aid. Therefore, it is not only impossible to banish fear from your life, but it is also undesirable. As though that were possible (which it is not), you are doing so would be akin to taking the batteries out of the smoke detectors in your home.



Fear is an indicator of one of two things: Either a bear running you up a tree in the woods, or you’re experimenting with the stuff you’re made of, with your courage quotient.


Regarding the former, congratulations that you’re alive to read this. In the latter, congratulations that you’re willing to pursue your purpose and passion even though you might suffer elevated blood pressure now and again.


Here’s the deal: If you’re alive, then, by all means, live!


Fear is part of your path, not separate from it.


One of the most destructive beliefs to living your purpose, finding your passion, and giving yourself permission to have a real impact is that having fear indicates something is wrong. No, no, no, no. That is NOT the case.


If you’re on purpose, you’re going to have fear. You can’t be on purpose without it. Why? Because fear is your body’s cue that you’re living large, shifting gears, out of your comfort zone, in your learning zone, and, for a change, experiencing a bit of exhilaration.


Did you know that your body experiences fear and excitement almost identically? True. Elevated heartbeat, sweaty palms, shallow rapid breathing, and dry mouth, to name a few.


If you’re committed to living a full, rich, impactful life, things aren’t going to be peaceful, centered and light all the time—you can expect to encounter some fear. So learn to enjoy it or, at the very least, appreciate its function in your life.


Yes, we can all benefit from a positive outlook; yes, we can learn to manage our fears; yes, we can even learn to use our fears productively. But that’s a far different story than the one saying that you shouldn’t have any fear.


Today would be a great day to give up the idea, once and for all, that courageous, powerful, invincible people lack the fear gene. Discarding that thought will make your life infinitely better.



PLEASE SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS in the comments below.


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Are you ready to make a change? Are you willing to put aside and work through your obstacles to realize your potential? Then schedule a 15-minute complimentary call with Nancy on our calendar .


Nancy D. Solomon, MA Psych is the CEO and Founder of The Leadership Incubator where she helps leaders identify, address and resolve people problems before they become profit problems so everyone can focus on what they were hired to do-- INNOVATE AND DRIVE GROWTH.


Known as The Impact Expert, she is a main stage speaker, expert trainer and veteran coach who helps leaders solve key issues related to leadership development, employee engagement, and advancing women.


Nancy has made a difference for such companies as Microsoft, Target, Acura, Westin, Nordstrom & ADP as well as with many passionate individuals.